yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
