spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
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