There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
