Your dad touched me again.
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Randomize
