Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
