When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
Reggie can tackle my bush.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Randomize
