he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
