Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
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So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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