that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
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