And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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