it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Randomize
