You're a womanizer and a bitch.
i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Randomize
