4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
if you like me you must not know who I am
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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