We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
