The maid of honor just puked.
You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
