We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
You're completely useless in the revolution.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
You're like the curious george of whores
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
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