1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.