just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
