Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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