...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
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