i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
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