I only kidnapped one of them. chill
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
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