he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Randomize
