Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
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