So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
