the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Randomize
