sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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