I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
