I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
if i died would you start the facebook group?
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize