More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize