she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you