Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Someone shattered a urinal.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
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