that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize