Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize
