If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
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if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
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i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
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