my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
