Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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