i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
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