using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize
