i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Randomize
