I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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