Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Randomize