Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
