No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize