Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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