Three words: puerto rican gang bang
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
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