8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize