this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
How naked do you want me to be?
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
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