I want to make a zoo with you.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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