i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
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