Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
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