life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
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